Having an Ethic of Love
Image via Martin Adams
Love was, is, and will always be a radical act, and its history one of radicalism, of daring to go further than one has gone before, despite great and violent opposition. This being the case because love requires something which very few people seem willing or able to do. Namely, to let go of the need for power and control.
A need that is so great because it is energized by an intense desire to quell one’s inner anxieties in order to live and exist comfortably, a pursuit, at its most extreme, in which it becomes painfully easy to objectify other people and view them as obstacles to the attainment of one’s goals, rather than as individuals with their own right to exist. Every act of evil committed surely has this quality of loveless objectification attached to it.
An ethic of love is at home within the existential tradition because of this tradition’s belief in the freedom to formulate one’s own values and beliefs in route to living fully. If you are trying to develop your own system of caring instead of staying wedded to the one you inherited, adopting an ethic of love is a good place to start. The values that belay this ethic include honesty, openness, and a commitment to giving your all in the endeavors that you choose. Doing so allows you to re-examine every area of your life and ask yourself if the qualities you seek to embody are present in how you live, in the places and ways that you choose to work, and in the way you relate to other people. Each sphere of your life, from the private to the public, can be considered.
Having integrity is required for practicing an ethic of love and you do this by deciding for yourself what is right and acting in accordance with this decision. This does not automatically negate the impact and value of already established traditions, but it does mean you actively choose to carry on or reject these traditions. Through actively choosing, traditions become your own in a way that they weren’t before. Or you may discover that your faith was misplaced and strike out on your own to discover a new path. Either way, more wisdom, meaning, and freedom await on this path once you find it.
It is unlikely that you will be joined by many on this path, and it is important to have a strong set of values to rely on. You must be willing to stand up for what you believe in, even if no one else agrees with you. It is an act of courageous defiance to stand against the cynicism and absurdity of the world, to accept that to live is to sometimes struggle, and fully embrace life anyway.
The position that love and freedom are radical ideas maintains its status in large part because of the failure by the majority to realize that freedom has always existed on the other side of safety. And safety is the price that everyone pays. It is often the case that those who would maintain the status quo for themselves are opposed to freedom for others, and one must work to never find themselves aligned with such forces.
This work, and all the stress and anxiety that it engenders is not to be avoided. Neither is it meant to be overcome. It is the path you perpetually travel as you ascend daily.